Love. It's a funny old word isn't it ? it has a real spectrum of meaning too in the way we use it. For instance, I love my family, I love a cuppa, I love Jammie Dodgers and I also love listening to music. Same word, but entirely different use. It's a concept we all have a definition of. Very early on in the process, we as actors were asked the question: "Do you believe in love at first sight ?" My response was "Yes I'm certain that it happens all the time". And while the music of the Beatles probably influenced my answer, it also highlighted that moment when the sleeping Titania awakens and falls in love with the ass headed Bottom.
Since working on the play, I've noticed that I'm getting regular dramatic epiphanies. They come out of nowhere, usually out of rehearsals and from the strangest places. I have wondered about ringing the NHS helpline to check out my symptoms (well there is a theatre connection even if it is an operating one); but I'm becoming more accustomed to them lately. That moment when Bottom claps eyes on Titania is for her a real 'firework' event. For me playing Bottom, it is one where he too is transfixed by this vision he encounters. As an actor, you need to find what that moment feels like. And that's where Smooth Radio stepped in.
I love a bit of cheese. I'm not talking Brie or Wensleydale here; I'm talking those great songs that seem to be played relentlessly on these 'nostalgic' stations. Songs from the past designed to remind you of how radical you were back then, or what a better world it was. One of my favourite songs is "Miss Grace" by the Tymes. It's a classic song with a wicked deep 'be-doobee-doobee' line that I always sing along to.
So there I am, singing along to it in the car, and I get my next epiphany. It's this part of the song that started it:
"Hey you, listen to me
I got a lot of truth I want to tell you
I just met a woman who turned me upside down
The rivers turn in their beds
Flowers bloom where she treads
She turns an awful lot of heads
When she comes to town.
The minute I saw your face
I knew that I loved you."
Bingo. This is what Bottom feels -his 'Miss Grace' is Titania and like the song, nature does bend to her presence. When she sees his face, "I knew that I loved you" And from then on it all gets a little more be-doobee-doobee….
If the truth be known however, My Titania moment happened 34 years ago.
I was a young 2nd year drama student listening to The Jam, the Human League and Elvis Costello, enjoying the delights of Jacobean drama and Absurd theatre. I had my CND badge proudly positioned on my 50p jacket from the Cat Protection League. I was in a student hall of residence and every day at mealtimes, we all used to troop in to be fed. One morning over the tray stacking tower, I noticed this girl. She was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar. Actually she wasn't, but it's still a good line. She was actually a History student-and stunning. Absolutely gorgeous. So in awe was I of her, that I could not bring myself to speak to her. This unrequited admiration went on for a few months. I'd see her in the dining room, admire, then just console myself I was out of her league. In the words of Kajagoogoo I was 'too shy". It was not meant to be. My 'love' for this vision who made mealtimes just a little bit more exciting, was just that. Or so I thought.
By a twist of fate, one of my actor friends started dating a girl. By a twist of fate, this girl happened to be the best friend of the girl I'd admired from afar for many weeks. It transpired that my mystery girl had a secret. She had confided to her friend that for weeks she had been coming into the dining room and seeing this guy who she thought was gorgeous. She had seen him dancing at a nightclub and was impressed by the shapes he was throwing out. She thought he was a drama student, but she was also 'a bit Kajagoogoo' (the international language word for shyness) and so therefore hadn't initiated any conversation. Surprisingly, it was me she was talking about.
Two days later, I was on a date. Meeting properly face to face was awesome. We'd both spent weeks admiring the other and not doing anything about it. For my part, I could not believe someone so beautiful as this girl had seen in me something she found incredibly attractive. And I guess that's exactly what Bottom feels.
The feeling I had when I met my mystery girl was my 'firework' moment. Like Bottom I could not believe what was happening; it felt a bit surreal and emotions of nervousness, excitement and fear seemed to forge together at once. A real "shivers down my backbone/got the shakes in my knee bone" moment. Standing there saying those first lines of conversation, there was a real sense of 'is this really happening'; hanging on to every word and trying to come to terms with the fact. Exactly like that first meeting Bottom has with Titania.
And now, that moment can be utilised in my performance as Bottom, because it's still as raw, as passionate and as vivid as it was all those years ago in a student bar somewhere in Loughborough.
Do I believe in a love at first sight ? Yes I'm certain that it happens all the time.
As for the mystery girl ? Well her name was Amanda and like Titania, she obviously cast some enchanted spell because we've spent the last 34 years together. She was the obvious choice for our stand in Titania, because she still works her magic on me every day.
"Strangest thing of all you see/Is that this could happen to me". I know how Bottom felt when he met Titania……. because I've felt it too.
Be-doobee-doobee.
And you can enjoy "Miss Grace" here:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6UdO7eHEpQ
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